Life’s A Beach

TV cameras routinely capture incidents where a number of Porpoises are found stranded on a beach. If found alive, rescuers attempt to return them to the sea and get them headed in the right direction. Oftentimes, this doesn’t work out as successfully as we would hope. Within a matter of days, these same Porpoises who were returned to the ocean end up back on the beach again. Why? Science doesn’t really get it.

Jesus was surrounded by people who just didn’t get it. At times, He would become frustrated, I would suggest somewhat exasperated, with those around Him. Jesus made remarks like, “How long shall I put up with you?”[i] “Do you still not understand?”[ii] “Don’t you understand this parable? How then will you understand any parable?”[iii] The Bible also makes specific reference to the fact that Jesus’ disciples were befuddled by what He was saying. They said things like, “We don’t understand what he is saying.”[iv] Finally, the Bible makes specific contextual references to the fact that “they did not understand what he was telling them.”[v]

Let’s be honest. Jesus is still surrounded by people in the twenty-first century who claim His name who just don’t get it. Both Jesus and John the Baptist used a term that seems to have faded from the vocabulary of present day Christians.[vi] It’s repent.

We’ve developed other terms to replace repent in our ordinary course conversations like change, reconsider and have an open mind. Unfortunately, none of these terms carry the meaning that Jesus and John the Baptist used. According to the footnotes in my Bible(s), repent means to make a radical change in one’s life.[vii] It involves thinking differently, regret and most importantly, a positive change in your behavior that is visible to other people.[viii] This opportunity to change your behavior is supplied by the power of God, not human willpower. It’s not something you talk about with other people, asking them whether or not they recognize that you have shed a few pounds because you need a slap on the back. It’s like saying “God, I just don’t get it. I can’t go on like this. I give up. I need you. Please help me.” It’s feeling like a beached Porpoise.

It was a nice spring evening about 7:40PM. Our home was filled with about thirty young adults seated wherever we could put them and jammed together on the floor. Every Thursday at 7:00PM we had a gathering of this group in our home (They usually began to show up at 5:00PM to eat before the meeting began). We would share what was going on in our lives, study the Bible together, encourage one another, laugh, cry and pray. One of the guys named Jess (not his real name) was very concerned about his brother Jeremy (not his real name). He had not seen or heard from his brother for several weeks and was becoming increasingly concerned. Everybody knew that Jeremy and his wife had struggled with drug and alcohol abuse. Nobody in the group had heard a word from Jeremy. Until 7:40PM when there was a knock at the door.

I guided Jeremy from the front door to my seat in the living room. His shirt was unbuttoned, revealing fresh, white bandages around his torso from his navel to his breasts. His right arm was in a sling. He was released from the hospital earlier that afternoon. As he shared his story of a drug purchase gone bad with the group, He lifted the bandages to reveal a gunshot wound and the stitches from the middle of his rib cage to the top of his navel. The doctors had saved his life.

For the next ten minutes Jeremy went on and on tearfully recounting the horror that drugs and alcohol had caused in his life. I can distinctly recall him saying several times “Never Again!” What he was really saying was “God, I just don’t get it. I can’t go on like this. I give up. I need you. Please help me. I’m as helpless as a beached Porpoise.”

Six weeks later I got a call from Jeremy’s brother Jess. He begged me to drop whatever I was doing and meet him at Jeremy’s apartment. It was dark. There were no lights on in the apartment. Jess had yet to arrive. I got out of the car and could hear a baby screaming inside one of the units in front of me. I grabbed a flashlight from the glove box. As I approached Jeremy’s apartment, the sound of horror coming from the lungs of a small child kept getting louder and louder. I pounded on the door for a minute and hollered Jeremy’s name several times. Nobody responded. The screaming child was obviously inside. I turned on my flashlight and aimed it through a crack in the drapes. I kicked in the door to find Amy naked in her crib, writhing in her own excrement. Within an hour or so, little eight-month-old Amy was on her way to the hospital with an agent for Child Protective Services. Amy had apparently been in her crib in that apartment alone, for several days. She was safely back at sea now.

As I drove home that evening, I was shaking, I burst out crying and pleaded out loud, “God! I just don’t get it! I can’t go on like this. I give up. I need you. Please help me!” My mind started asking all those questions that can never be answered at the moment you ask them like, “Is there really such a thing as repentance? Is repentance some sort of privilege for a select few? Who decides? Why do unrepentant people cause harm to others?”

After several months, I began to realize that repentance is not an event; it’s a process…a daily commitment to humbly embrace the fact that “God! I just don’t get it! I want more of You. I surrender this day to you. I need you. Even when I think life is going on just swimmingly, I know I’m just one wave away from being stranded on the beach. Please help me!” As one author succinctly puts it, “Dependence, sorrow, repentance, a longing to change-these are the gates to God’s kingdom.”[ix]

Pray for Amy.

NOTES

[ii] Matthew 16:9

[iii] Mark 4:13

[iv] John 16:18

[v] John 10:6

[vi] Matthew 4:17 and 3:1

[vii] Footnote – Matthew 3:2

[viii] Footnote – Matthew 3:7 – Life Application Study Bible

[ix] Yancey, Philip. The Jesus I Never Knew, Zondervan Grand Rapids, Michigan Copyright ©1995 by Philip Yancey, p. 114.

Christialiens Imposters Inhabit the Body of Christ in the U.S.

Alien Abduction

They’re among us.

Have you ever seen one of those science fiction movies where aliens from another planet take over the physical bodies of unsuspecting earthlings? Somehow, the unsuspecting Christian is snatched up and beamed aboard some sort of spacecraft where the transformation takes place. (I’ve never been on one of these ships but I sure would like to get a look at the inside of one). When they’re returned to earth, they look exactly the same as before they were abducted. The abductees typically have no near-term recollection of what has happened to them. Yet, they behave quite differently. Let me explain.

Infectious Disease Alert #2005-654 B:

The Christian Center for Disease Control (‘CCDC’) has issued the following health alert for the Christian community in the U.S.: “It appears that the body of Christ in the U.S. has become infected with imposters. We are referring to the afflicted beings as Christialiens,” according to Dr. Larry Frank, Communications Director for the Institute. “We have several thousand suspected cases. Unfortunately, this outbreak has now officially been identified as possessing the clear and present danger of becoming an epidemic.”

The Apprehension:

Acting on anonymous tips, the CIA (Christian Intelligence Agency) launched a nationwide, multi-agency, covert sting operation. Agencies involved included the DEA (Disciples to End Apostasy), the ATF (Agency of True Faith) and the FBI (Federal Bureau of Insurrection). Through the use of confidential informants and the successful infiltration by undercover agents, the task force apprehended several hundred Christialiens during the last week in the Washington, D.C. and Louisville, Kentucky areas.

In Washington D.C., San Diego radio-show host Roger Hedgecock of the “Hold Their Feet to the Fire” claim to fame was accompanied by 16 other radio hosts from California (John and Ken from KFI in Los Angeles were there), Texas, Arizona, Idaho, Montana, Arkansas, New Mexico, Pennsylvania, Tennessee, Ohio and Washington state. These folks aired their radio broadcasts live from a Holiday Inn meeting room near the U.S. Capitol. Joining these hosts were and an estimated 400 fans ( proudly referred to as the “Angry Mob.”). In Louisville, KY,   the Justice Sunday gathering was held at a megachurch with a highly anticipated, videotaped, keynote address entitled Stop The Filibuster Against People of Faith from Senate Majority leader Bill Frist. It was broadcast via satellite simulcast to hundreds of thousands of the Christalien brethren throughout the United States. According to Task Force spokesman R.E. Pentance, “These events were identified by agency informants as target rich environments infiltrated by hundreds of Christialien insurgents.”

The Interrogation

Detainees apprehended at these events for questioning were whisked away by Task Force personnel and are presently quarantined in a secure, underground bunker. The location has not been disclosed due to national security considerations. The Christian Center for Disease Control (‘CCDC’) disclosed today that they have completed in-depth interrogations of 304 suspected Christaliens infected with the disease. At a press conference today, Dr. Hans Lewis, Director of the National Academy of Christian Epidemiology, who led a team of theologians who conducted the interviews and have profiled the characteristics of the malady stated: “There appear to be no visible, external, physical symptoms of the disease. You cannot distinguish between a sufferer and a healthy disciple from their outward appearance. Each sufferer has a vague recollection of being transported to a place (the abduction) where they became inhabited with the malady. It may be infectious. It’s just too early to tell. Clearly, the heart and mind of the unsuspecting victim have been significantly altered. We have identified the source as the Devil himself.” (Gasps from the crowd were heard as a female reporter ran from the Media room screaming hysterically, “They’re here! They’re really here!”).

Christialien Diagnosis:

The following section will describe the symptoms of Christialiens, as outlined by Dr. Lewis and his team:

1.    Power focused faith – The patients have become spiritually overwhelmed with socio-political issues of secular life. Their focus on Christ has diminished markedly, in some cases, altogether. They are clearly overwhelmed with concerns about what is going on with the legislative, judicial and executive branches of the U.S. government. Winning, losing or spinning their personal interpretation on these issues has become their ultimate concern. They have distinctly lost their ability to sustain a focus on their personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

2.    Self-Righteousness – The need to have ‘right’ beliefs on particular social and political issues in our culture has become the overriding concern of the Christialien. They are obsessed with position that they have all the right answers. They contend that the only problem is that the rest of us aren’t listening. They are compulsive about characterizing the world as us vs. them. Rather than treating them as neighbors to be loved, them has morphed into opposition enemies to be trampled and eliminated. This obsessive-compulsive dimension of the Christialien disorder results in markedly reduced or complete abandonment of their individual devotion to, and worship time with Christ. Worship has become warship for these poor folks whereby assemblies of believers are focused on bartering with God to bless the days pressing political agenda rather than house the homeless, feed the hungry or love their undocumented immigrant neighbors as themselves. Every Sunday, the pulpit is used a gun turret to target the coming weeks focus of the congregation’s spiritual coordinates.

3.    Arteriosclerosis – According to Dr. Lewis and his team, “Without exception, each Christalien suffers from an advanced ‘hardness of heart’ condition. Commonly referred to as arteriosclerosis or a hardening of the arterial walls of the heart that leads to impaired circulation.  It is particularly acute in patients when confronted by others who hold views on issues that are different from theirs.”

4.    Arthrightus – Due to the circulatory impairment described above, Christialiens have become rigid, narrow-minded, mean-spirited and inflexible in their thinking and communication. This behavior has a tendency to be revolting to others and creates social distance between the Christialien and others in our nation. Rather than sincerely seeking to fulfill the Great Commission by attracting others to Christ, Christialiens repel others from seeking a relationship with their God. Christaliens feel distinctly superior to others. They think of those who hold views contrary to theirs as less than, evil and defective.

Treatment/Immunization:

According to the CCDC, “The health of the body of Christ in the U.S. is under siege. Don’t panic. Repent and pray! Fall to your knees and ask Jesus to intervene in all this madness. Confess that you too have experienced some of the symptoms described herein. Confess to Him that you have felt resentment, disdain or disgust toward those who have been abducted and inhabited by the disease of the suffering Christialien. Pray that each of us shall muster the supernatural strength to hear and heed the following: “Narrow all your interests until the attitude of mind and heart and body is concentration on Jesus Christ. “Look unto Me!”  How do we do this? “We shall not become like Christ until we give Him more time.”

We’ve been invaded Christendom!

Once upon a time,
There were 7 Rabbits.
They lived for decades among us,
Becoming wise about our habits.

They sat, watched, learned and listened,
To all our songs, praise, prayers, and conversations.
This poem is about what they learned,
Within the walls of Christianity’s congregations.

These 7 rabbits became so concerned,
They began to pray to God.
That He would intervene,
And correct what they deemed so odd.

God answered the prayer of these rabbits,
Then sent them on a mission.
To speak to those who claim His name,
To act upon this message of repentance and contrition.

I fell asleep in the park one afternoon.
When I was abruptly awakened from my slumber.
I was surrounded by rabbits!
Seven was their number.

I thought I was dreaming,
But as I rubbed my eyes,
I thought I heard one whisper:
“He will never believe this you guys!”

I took a drink of water,
Shook my head in disbelief.
The gray one said, “Listen Up!”
As the brown one munched a leaf.

“We know this is probably difficult.
It might be hard for you to swallow.
God sent us here to speak to you,
Before we return to our hollow.”

“You’ve wrung the mystery out of the Gospel.
Ready with specific answers, black and white.
What’s a person with questions and doubts to do?
Your approach, it’s just not right.”

“How can His children come to you?
Overwhelmed with fears and frustration.
When you’re not even listening!
You confound their consternation.”

“The way you live His Gospel,
Your approach to daily life you must reshape.
The ordinary in every day must be revalued,
It’s not something you attempt to escape.”

The large white one came to the forefront,
A few hops in front of the others.
“The message we have to deliver,
Is for your fathers, sister’s, moms and brothers.

“God, He’s quite concerned.
His Church was christened to be effective.
Man has slyly manipulated the intent,
Your efforts have become defective.”

“Don’t look so defensive.
That’s no way to start.
Digest what we have to share with you,
Not with your head, but with your heart.”

“The way you live your lives,
For all the world to see.
It’s a picture of the religion business.
It’s time to get back to reality.”

“You’ve come to idolize something strange,
prosperity, false promises, and the unique.
Perhaps it’s time to reconsider why,
Ordinary folks avoid you like a freak.”

The white rabbit hopped back among the group,
The black one began to wiggle his white nose.
“Let’s not focus on the past, he said.
That’s not why Jesus rose.”

“Ever since Acts chapter two;
The moment that began His disciples emergence.
His Spirit was outpoured as a gift to you,
Guiding you toward His kingdom’s new resurgence.”

“What man has done since that time,
You’ve become self-righteous and so proud!
The unspeakable things you’ve done in His name,
Cannot be spoken of aloud.”

“You Christians scurry here and there,
Like life’s meaning is to remain eternally busy.
You’re running round in circles.
Going nowhere, getting dizzy.”

“Some of you who claim His Name,
The millions who declare “I’m saved by grace.”
God has much more for you beyond this notion,
Draw near and seek His face.”

“Your world is filled with choices,
So many you feel you just may burst.
It’s caused you to become self-centered.
Displacing His example to put His others first.”

A planet filled with the poor and hungry,
You focus on getting your share of enough.
You’ve developed a ravenous appetite,
Feasting on all the world’s wrong stuff.

“Wipe that sneer off your face!”
Shouted the light tan bunny.
“Don’t get smug with us!
The truth is tough. It’s not remotely funny.”

“What you men can’t comprehend
Is the impact of your defective behavior.
On Earth as it is in heaven,
Is the intention of your Savior.”

“God sent us here to tell you,
He expects an immediate shift.
This existence you enjoy on this Earth,
Is to be lived as a supernatural gift.”

“Building businesses around His people,
You’re sly with your deceit.
You’ve created castles surrounded by moats,
Not Christ’s heart, hands, arms and feet!”

“Jesus was loved by sinners.
Have you considered why they don’t like you?
He only walked on water once.
Perhaps this might provide a clue.”

The green bunny on the right,
He hopped forward twice.
“I’m to remind you about another thing,
The importance of sacrifice.”

“He told you to choose the narrow gate.
Yet, you’ve changed the pathway and the door.
Numbed by all your creature comforts,
The hungry, homeless, and the sick, are the one’s you now ignore.

“You people have got it all wrong,
You think you’re really living.
Lives idolizing comfort and accumulation,
Immune from the blessedness of giving.

“Look around your life my friend.
Identify the nonsense you must discard.
There’s no room for the gift of sacrificial living
Amongst the essentials piled in your barnyard.”

The blue bunny leapt ahead of the green one,
Her eyes were red like fire.
“I’m here to speak toward authenticity.
Man has become a quintessential liar.”

“Drop your top hat, wand and magic tricks.
Stand silently, listening to the wind in the trees.
Listen for His still small voice,
In reverence, drop down on your knees.”

“As you walk daily through humanity,
Feeling self-righteous, smug and proud.
This mindset separates you from His children.
It’s time to become one of the crowd.”

“You say time is your most precious asset.
To love God with all your heart seems odd.
He desires more time alone with you.
He said, “Be still and know that I am God.”

The brown one stopped his munching and exclaimed:
“How’s it feel to be talked to by 7 rabbits?
God decided to get your attention today,
To examine your defective habits.”

“The way you speak about one another,
You sound like angry parrots.
Perhaps you might spend more time in prayer,
Or stuff your mouth with carrots.”

“God said to remind you,
About the dangers of your tongue;
Let your actions do your talking,
Caring for one another, the elderly and the young.”

“You’re too focused on being right,
Your words alienate, push and shove.
What does being right,
Have anything to do with His boundless love?”

The brown one hopped back among the six.
Their collective glare made me cower.
“Detach yourselves from partisan politics,
His Kingdom doesn’t need that kind of power.”

“You’ve become addicted to drama,
The extraordinary, and center-stage.
It’s time for a new script.
Something an ordinary audience can engage.”

With that he flicked his big brown left ear.
All 7 hopped out of sight across the lawn.
I suddenly became very drowsy
And fell asleep until the dawn.

What is one to do?
When visited by 7 rabbits?
How can you share this story,
That we Christians must change our habits?

As I contemplated this experience,
With the astonishment of a child.
I pondered the possibility,
We’ve domesticated what He intended to be wild.

Perhaps we must begin to pursue Him
With renewed passion and imagination.
Yearning for The One,
To restore our inspiration.

As I gazed above into the trees above,
I saw a little bird on a perch.
“If I was you I’d examine your ways.
God said you are His church.”